And all the stars are falling....

danglingstars @ 2009-02-19T21:42:00

2009-02-20T05:42:06Z

I got "tagged" and given a topic, here are the poems that resulted. I haven't written a poem in 2 years, so I'm giving myself leeway to suck.:)

Melodies of My Muse

you play those notes with no deception
your heart is out for all to see
it never takes but just a moment
for me to breathe in what you mean
it doesn't matter if you speak it
or if its in the way you smile
your love captures every second, of the nights we spend together.
the melodies you create when we have finished,
oh, they bring me to my knees.
if i'm your muse, you are my sunrise
because it all begins with you

Candid Memories

Sometimes I mistake
My dreams of you
for reality
It never seems to matter...
if you're coming or you're going,
these memories I'm making
will go on without you.

If I'm being honest,
you're better in the real world
the one where I don't say the right thing
and my dress is wrinkled, shoes untied
these candid memories are blurry,
not so serene as the ones I dream each night

i'll keep on dreaming,
because that's who I am
but you're with me here, holding my hand
and I don't need to hold those fantasies so tight

playing catch-up

2006-10-27T02:03:48Z

written sept. 12th

strike me off
your list
it's not worth getting into.
in all of it's entirety,
it was only a mess.

this was never combat
but.
perception is my favorite weapon
and i can see right through you.

enough of all these bitter grumblings
on my answering machine.
I can't change it,
and you don't want to.
it all wont end like fairy-tales.

these wounds you bare
are artificial,
at best.
but you let them keep you grounded.

so pick a new subject,
to drown in all your sorrows.
i can't change this,
and you don't want to.
it all wont end like fairy-tales.

it all wont end like fairy-tales.
----------------------------------------------------------

written august 10th
Onward and upward,
Water under the bridge,
You can pick any phrase you like
To tell me you've moved on.

I wish it were that easy for me
To forget all our words shared,
Our linked hands on a restless night.
So long I had relied upon you,
To show me the world
Which resided in your smile, and caress.

It wasn't long before you faded away
Took a long glance at a perfect silhouette
Too busy to hold my hand
My quirks becoming a bore

Your absence haunting
I knew you had left
Before you even shut the door.

You talk to me
As though this is all so standard
Folded neatly in a box
Tucked away in a closet labeled love.

You give me a hug
While you gather your new belonging
A girl who see's the world in your smile
And I finally understand
Why my heart began to beat so fast
When you slammed that door.

I finally had the strength to breathe

(what's weird is that this was one of those thinking of a story and then I wrote it, and not a week later a good friend announced she was separated from her husband, under similar circumstances.)

danglingstars @ 2006-07-30T18:56:00

2006-07-31T01:56:55Z

scatterbrained.
a little bit off,
a little to the right.
all over the place,
in the very best sense.
what does it take
to be the best?
how can you force
what you dont know you want?
perfecting the art of
fearful indecision.
full of good intentions
riddled with the what if
and the why not to.
carefully plotting
the next big dream.
the next step up.
all over the place.
what's next?

danglingstars @ 2006-01-15T23:54:00

2006-01-16T07:54:44Z

emotionally inconsistent.
i cant blame it on the time of the month,
or that time you screwed me over.
i can only blame it on my melodramatic heart.

ever wonder what it would be like to be somebody else?
who hasn't.
ever wonder what it would be like to be yourself?
theres a question worth giving a moments thought.
i promise that wasn't as serious as it seemed.

i always regret what i've just spoken.

bigger dreams than i let on.
relying on what I need at the end of the day.
is it ok to walk the beaten path,
since everyone else goes the other way?

such a funny feeling,
being tired and restless at the very same time.
i'm disassociated....
just like everyone else.
yawn.
can we think of something new now?

what a tangent,
what a relief,
what a ...mess.
emotionally inconsistent.

danglingstars @ 2005-08-28T02:00:00

2005-08-28T09:00:45Z

when will it all fall apart?
when does it all come tumbling down...
bit by bit.
gonna break my heart, aren't you?
I can't afford to trust it.
too deep in this water,
to catch a glimpse of my feet.
you know i need to have control,
but you really don't care.
is this all just one big tease...
is this my tragic loss, my lost love, my biggest scar?
i smile but im waiting for
your sly grin,
while this tumbles to the ground.
undone, dead, rotten

I think I'm paranoid.
I'm afraid I'm right.

------
This probably isn't what you think, it's not directed towards the bf, but actually the universe/fate/whatever.

danglingstars @ 2005-04-15T04:09:00

2005-04-15T11:09:16Z

I want to be more than myself
smarter, quicker, thinner, bitter
Who always knew, who casts the blame
aloof and obscure, (vaugely insecure)
Confusing you with my mysterious gaze
that disguises my apathy
Caring not about your eyes
or your disarming laugh
Who takes a drag from her fourth ciggarette
and tells you not to try so hard
I'm just not that girl
i'm the one who you talk to
Through the middle of the night
I'm the one who laughs at all your elaborate stories
tells you what you need to hear
Watches you from afar with a longing gaze
Who dreams too hard
cares too much
Never mind this girl
see right through that girl
I want to be more than myself
deeper, darker, intense, full of myself
I'm just never gonna turn out that way
i'm always gonna have a smile
When I greet you at the door
i'm never gonna say the right thing
at the right time
So i'm just gonna kiss you
and walk out the door
Find her in someone else
'cause I cannot pretend
That I don't want you to myself
maybe soon
you'll want that girl

older poem

2004-11-26T03:43:58Z

unable to grasp the word forever
scared of the makings of goodbye
unsure of the depth of our ocean
sinking in the current of my mind
whispering questions that cannot be answered
searching for a sign to show it's real
hoping my feet are traveling the right path
doubting every truth I've come to know
shouting to the sky my careless desires
waiting for the voice of reason's melody
waiting..
awaiting...
when will I see?

danglingstars @ 2004-11-25T19:43:00

2004-11-26T03:43:34Z

haven't updated in here in awhile, 2 NEW poems

Kiss me cause I'm going crazy
I cant answer why.
It's everything stirring inside of me
Everything I can't let you understand.
Kiss me with those sweet, sweet lips
Undo the pain I cannot uncover
But feel with every pause I take.
Break my heart
So I can blame it all on you.
So you can blame it all on me.
Kiss me cause i'm going crazy

Gone

danglingstars @ 2004-09-03T01:22:00

2004-09-03T08:22:04Z

I want to wear my rose colored glasses
But I've been blinded by the past
I want to see that look
When I'm the only thing you want to behold
And I want you to hold onto me tight
But let me run free when I please
I want you to see the treasure
That's within my eyes and mind
I want to see the smile that softens my heart.
I want your full attention
And I want to hold your hand
I want everything out of you
But you don't want to give
So I'll say good-bye for now
And walk away
Without tears
Without a second try
And I'll hope for something more

Written at age 16

2004-08-21T20:48:24Z

You say you care if I never say your name again
You say you care that my tears are 'cause of you
You say you care that my heart has been stomped on
You say you care and now you feel it too.
It's not your fault,
I scream
But am I being truthful?
We both thought it would work
It didnt.
I cant make up my mind on what I truely need
Will you hold me until I do?
You say I'm special and you never want to loose me
You say you cry because you have caused my pain
You say that you dont regret what happened
You say you dont want me to go away
Please tell me the answers I'm so deperate to hear
Please, just make it all ok
Just tell me what you really want to say.

----

I really don't like this poem. *laughs* I think it could be written better. But, at the same time, I remember the exact emotion I felt when I wrote this..and I think a lot of people can relate to this emotion. When you are run ragged, and you can't tell up from down, and the person you care about is the one controlling it all. You just want answers, real ones. No more games.

older poem

2004-07-04T20:39:22Z

Your eyes
They dance under the moonlight,
They radiate upon my soul
They wander over my every move,
And they cry upon my shoulder.
Your eyes
Take me for a joyride,
Over mountains of emotions and wonderment,
To lead me to your arms
And the warmness of your kiss.
Your eyes
Are the clearest when it's raining,
Because you show me the sunshine,
And the everlasting bloom of my body.
Your eyes
Are the windows which I look towards
When I'm shrouded in self-doubt
And,your eyes
Guide my mind
To the real
Me

Split--older

2004-07-04T02:10:42Z

I'm split in two,
Wondering,
If I'll ever get back to
Sanity.
I cry at night
And pretend everything is alright
When you are near.
There is so much I wish for,
And the person I am now...
Isn't in my dreams.
Why am I so afraid
To let all of you down?
If I continue on this dreary road,
The one that beckons me now
Will fade away.....
Can I let this happen?
I hope that answer is
No.

Truth..written sometime at age 16

2004-07-01T09:39:34Z

The truth is
I cannot breathe
Inside this skin.
Reflections blurred,
Through unshead tears.
Thoughts clouded,
With what I've viewed
Inside these walls I live.
Empty inside?
No.
Full...
With words I cannot speak
And emotions,
Reject from feeling.
I'm just not ready
To see what's all there.
I float on clouds
Of dreams so vivid,
That I do not grasp
Reality.
It's easy to live
In a world,
Where walls expand to fit lies
Disguised as flowers.
The truth is
I haven't found it yet.

A freewrite written winter before last

2004-06-22T04:12:54Z

There are many days when just the smell of a tiny yellow flower can make me content. I can put it in the curls of my brown hair, and I can walk as though I love myself and dream of what's to come. I hope for the best and look for that silver lining in the clouds.

But then there are days when every shadow envelops me into it's dark and meloncholy soul. I feel as though the world is against me, and no one really cares about my tears or my smiles. I am completely taken for granted, pushed to the side and left to pull myself back into the sunshine and the flowers...and I do, time and time again.

There are days when I see something happen. A tear or a problem with a friend. I talk, and listen to their worries. And I know just what to say to see them through. I make things a little better, and they walk with yellow flowers in their hair.

But then their are days when I see my friends get pulled into the shadows, and my eyes fill with tears of their wounds, and my words do not comfort or console, they just bounce along the ground at my feet.

The t.v and the movies tell me I'm not good enough, but who's to say I listen to there words? It's only those days in the shadows I let my ears open. It's the days when flowers are not blooming, and I'm swimming in a sea of maybelline and slim-fast. Letting myself listen to the words whispered when I turn my back, or the ones imagined in my dreams. But when I look into the mirror, I only see what should and should not be there. It's only those days when I look beyond the mirror, and into the garden of my heart..that I notice there are flowers. Some are red, yellow..even blue.

There are some days when the petals are wilting, but then I know the tears from my days in the shadows, feed the flowers as fragile as they may be. So that I can walk with yellow flowers in my hair.

danglingstars @ 2004-06-16T16:50:00

2004-06-16T23:50:10Z

I'm going to be posting a poem a day, or a short story..going through what I have saved on my computer, and also adding anything that I write which is new. I'd like any feedback, and remember..some of these poems go back to when I was 15 and just starting to write poetry, and some older short stories and things as well.

This one is old...but I think people can relate.

I try
So very hard.
To pretend I don't care anymore.
To pretend that your voice doesn't haunt me
And that I still don't miss your kiss.
So I just try
Not to cry.

Tears are a sign
Of a heart broken.
I've put back together the pieces,
But the glue seems to wear thin.

I try
To move on
I try to dream of others
To dream of kisses and warm embraces
But your arms are the only thing I see.
So I try
Not to dream

Give me answers
And Hold me close
Or will that just bring more torment
In the end?
I try
And I try.

danglingstars @ 2004-04-19T05:45:00

2004-04-19T12:45:44Z

testing

1 2 3

..........